memorable bea quotes #1

Me: Mummy’s sister has a baby in her tummy, just like I did. Isn’t that exciting?
Beatrix: Wow! What’s it called?
Me: Well, we don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl yet. We have to wait and see. Do you know any good names? What about boy names?
Beatrix: Finny.
Me: Finny? Okay. What about girl names?
Beatrix: Um.. Hamstring.

Beatrix: (screams) SHIT-FUCK!
Me: (rushing in) What’s wrong?
Beatrix: (matter-of-factly) I said “shit-fuck”.
Me: Yes, I know you said…um, yes, I heard you. Why did you say that?
Beatrix: The couch was being naughty.
Me: What did it do?
Beatrix: It was eating my leg.
Me: Oh. Okay.

Beatrix: Can we watch Seinfeld?
Me: Okay. Do you know their names? (pointing) That’s Kramer.
Beatrix: Kramer.
Me: That’s Geo…
Beatrix: George.
Me: Good! That’s Elaine.
Beatrix: Elaine.
Me: And that’s…
Beatrix: I know.
Me: Do you? What is it?
Beatrix: Cherry Seinfeld.

Beatrix: Excuse me, Mummy?
Me: Yes, Bea?
Beatrix: Girls have two bottoms.
Me: Yes, that’s right.
Beatrix: Boys only have one bottom. And a silly bottom.

More as they happen. Unfortunately that’s all I can remember right now.