movin on up

So I could lacquer this post with “I’m a big girl!” slogans and throw in some shit about my destiny and adulthood, but really, I’m mostly lookin’ for a new place to live because I’m worried that me and my girls are going to give my mother a heartattack soon, and realistically, the woman deserves her own space. If you can’t get it by your mid fifties, there’s a slight cause for concern. It will be more than a huge adjustment, and yes, the first feeling that the entire scenario makes me think is “LONELY”, but I think it will be a very great and important step on the road to becoming IndependentMe! – who seems to be dwindling a bit as of late. I feel a bit like I’m living the existence of a stunted adolescence, and that doesn’t really make me feel like a good person, let alone a role model for two little girls who I am the sculptor of.

Luckily, this afternoon, we’re going around the corner to check out a little apartment above a shop on the main road. It is less than a 5 minute walk from my current residence, it is 2 bedrooms and a lot closer to the railway line than we currently are. It is also still remarkably close to Bea’s future primary school, and I think if I can keep most of the day care and schooling plans that I had concreted, then it will seem like much less of an uproot and mindfuck to have to move all of a sudden.

This isn’t to say, however, that we are being kicked onto the street. Not at all. And this isn’t to say that we will definitely secure the property. My rental history has been pretty poor in the regard that not many are willing to rent to someone with no actual job (even though my income is much more regular and secure than most people of my age group) and who has a mohawked picture on their KeyPass (ID) that looks like Marilyn Manson’s child-bride on steroids. I consider myself a pretty responsible, quiet, motherly tenant; and it sucks a little bit that I’m fairly certain that they just throw my application straight into the bin as soon as they see my concession card number. Sigh! I’m hoping that this place is such a hole that I’m the only one that shows up – and that it’s a hole in the quaint, Brunswickian way that I can cute up and deal with – not a hole in the rotting staircase sort of a way…